Below is a comment from “kristinab” from the website jezebel.com on the blog post here.

It struck me as very true and worth repeating…

“we ask so much of rape victims.

we ask them to be attractive enough to be rape-able.

we ask them to be victimized by someone that no one would want to have sex with anyways, cause otherwise, the guys would have just found someone else to have sex with, right?

we ask them to not just say no, but to say no in a certain specific way.

we ask them to be virgins, in many cases, or at least, if they are a certain age, married.

we ask them to be dressed a certain way, or at least, NOT dressed a certain way, so as to minimize the possibility that they provoked their rapists.

we ask them to be sufficiently emotional afterwards, and to have the correct attitudes about forgiveness.

we ask them to be near strangers to their rapists.

we ask them to live in very nice neighborhoods, refrain from traveling alone through not-nice neighborhoods, and refrain from asking the wrong person to help them navigate the not-nice neighborhoods.

we ask them to never ever drink socially when on a date with a potential rapist.

we ask them to know which guys are “like that” and which aren’t so that they can be responsible for their safety and stay away from the “wrong guys”.

we ask more from rape victims than we do of any other kind of victim, and it’s really heartbreaking. My anthropology teacher said yesterday that “for women, there are few, if any, countries that are truly ‘developed’, or ‘first-world’”, and i have to agree.”

I’ve tried to avoid being the kind of person who pushes their political beliefs on others. I’m more interested in people voting at all than I am in people voting for “my” candidate. After casting my ballot the other day, though, I realized I have to say something. Never have the people of Texas been given such a shining opportunity to truly make a difference. Your vote in this primary race counts more than ever.

I have advocated and supported Barack Obama since his first appearance in the national spotlight as the keynote speaker at the 2004 Democratic National Convention. I have been consistently impressed with his ability to unite and inspire people to band together to make this nation whole again. His message has always been that of a uniter, not a divider.

I would love to see a woman in the White House as much as anyone. Unfortunately, I don’t think Hillary Clinton is the person for the job. I am unimpressed by the dynastic element of her run, and she has increasingly struck me as someone who only cares about winning. In last night’s debate, I was taken aback by the cheap shots she took at Obama and her rudeness to the moderator. Obama’s response was to counter her attacks calmly while expressing respect for her record. I am consistently impressed by his personal grace and respectfulness towards others.

Already, Obama has demonstrated his ability to inspire people to take action. Over 10,000 people showed up for his rally at the Capitol today. His campaign has 962,000 individuals and counting as donors. I think it says something that I have never before given money to any political candidate, but two weeks ago I felt the need to contribute. I don’t remember the last time I’ve seen so many people excited about an election.

I believe Barack Obama is the one candidate capable of truly representing us to the rest of the world. Obama’s time spent living overseas as a youth gives him a unique perspective too few Americans can boast. In the current climate of the diminished dollar and a ruined global reputation, America can no longer afford to ignore our effect on the world and, frankly, we can use all the perspective we can get. His stance on the war will, I believe, help us get on the right track so we can finish business and bring the troops home. Obama’s commitment to transparency in government can only engage and inspire people to get involved in their own governance. He believes change happens from the bottom up, and that each individual deserves a chance to be heard.

I hope that in my lifetime I get to witness the return of America, land of the free and home of the brave. I hope that our next president is able to unite this country behind him in order to heal the wounds we’ve inflicted on less privileged nations. I hope that the office of the President of the United States of America can regain its former dignity and acquire good judgment and compassion in the process. I hope that an intelligent, well-traveled, well-spoken, multi-ethnic candidate can be elected to represent the best and truest face of these United States.

In 2005, William Skidelsky of the British journal New Statesman compiled a list of the “10 people who could change the world”. Barack Obama was the only politician on that list.

Sufficiently inspired?

Educate yourself: www.hillaryclinton.com & www.barackobama.com

The Austin Chronicle gives some compelling endorsements:
http://www.austinchronicle.com/gyrobase/Issue/story?oid=oid%3A591672

Make sure you are registered: http://www.traviscountytax.org/goVoters.doregister

And then vote, dammit!

Travis County voters may vote at ANY early voting location.
Early voting begins on 2/19/2008 and ends on 2/29/2008.

How can I vote early?
Registered voters can vote with a voter registration card, driver’s license or any official photo ID, birth certificate, United States citizenship papers or passport, a copy of a current utility bill, bank statement or other official document that shows the name and address of the voter.
NOTE TO FIRST-TIME VOTERS: If you are a first-time voter in Travis County who registered to vote by mail and did not previously provide a copy of ID, you must show a form of ID other than a Voter Registration Certificate before voting.

Where can I get more information?

For questions about your Voter Registration Card, call 854-9473.

The following locations are available:
Monday – Friday 10 am – 6 pm
Saturday 10 am – 1 pm
Sunday Closed
Central

* Washington Mutual Bank (WaMu)***NEW LOCATION.
1000 East 41st Street, Suite 710

The following locations are available:
Monday – Friday 10 am – 7 pm
Saturday 10 am – 5 pm
Sunday Closed
Central

* Howson Public Library
2500 Exposition Boulevard

Southeast

* Dan Ruiz Public Library
1600 Grove Boulevard

The following locations are available:
Monday – Friday 10 am – 7 pm
Saturday 10 am – 5 pm
Sunday Noon – 6 pm
East

* Parque Zaragosa Recreation Center
2608 Gonzales Street @ East 7th Street

The following locations are available:
Monday – Saturday 10 am – 7 pm
Sunday Noon – 6 pm
Northeast

* MT Supermarket
10901 North Lamar Boulevard, Bldg G at Chinatown Center

The following locations are available:
Monday – Saturday 7 am – 7 pm
Sunday Closed
North

* RRISD Performing Arts Center***NEW LOCATION.
5800 McNeil Drive

The following locations are available:
Monday – Saturday, 7:00 AM to 7:00 PM
Sunday, Noon to 6:00 PM
Central

* Fiesta Mart Central
3909 North IH35 @ Delwood Shopping Center
* Travis County Courthouse
1000 Guadalupe
* University of Texas
Flawn Academic Center lobby, West Mall, UT Campus
* Travis County Airport Blvd Offices
5501 Airport Boulevard

East

* Northeast Health Center at the Springdale Shopping Center
7112 Ed Bluestein Boulevard, Suite 155

North

* Ben Hur Shriners Hall***NEW LOCATION.
7811 Rockwood Lane

Northeast

* County Tax Office Pflugerville
15822 Foothill Farms Loop, just off Pecan Street, Pflugerville

Northwest

* HEB Four Points 620 and 2222
7301 FM 620 North @ RR 2222 (temp. bldg. in parking lot)
* Randalls Research and Braker
10900-D Research Boulevard @ Braker Lane

South

* Randalls Ben White and Manchaca
2025 West Ben White Boulevard @ Manchaca
* HEB South Congress and Oltorf
2400 South Congress (temp. bldg. In parking lot)

Southeast

* Fiesta Mart Stassney
5510 S. IH-35 @ Stassney

Southwest

* Randalls Brodie and Slaughter
9911 Brodie Lane @ Slaughter Lane
* Randalls South Mopac and William Cannon
6600 South Mopac @ William Cannon

West

* Bee Cave City Hall***NEW LOCATION.
4000 Galleria Parkway
* Flagship Randalls on Bee Caves Road, Westlake
3300 Bee Caves Road
* Randalls Lakeway
2303 RR 620 South

The following locations are available:
Monday – Saturday, 9:00 AM to 8:00 PM
Sunday, Noon to 6:00 PM
North

* Highland Mall
6001 Airport Boulevard

OK, so my husband is a musician and he’s been on tour now for exactly 15 days. By himself. Driving across from Texas to L.A. and then up along the West Coast. And it’s really starting to get hard. I miss him. Which is kind of like, duh, right? The first week was fine, got my girl time in, hung out with family. But now the missing is really starting and he’s still going to be gone for at least another week. My cat and I have really gotten to know each other. Really well. I’m even thinking about getting a dog. I’ve EVEN read the first Dune novel and want to see the movie. In short, I’m not handling this well, people.

It’s funny because I sort of encouraged him to do this. He’s been a musician since we got together, but the past fews years have been kind of fallow for him. I encouraged him to quit his old job (it was an OK paying job with benefits and good friends, but ultimately soul and time-sucking. Plus he’d already worked there for 12 years, and was just spinning his wheels.) I encouraged him to do more solo stuff when he was fretting over not having a band together (he writes his own songs, sings and plays guitar). I told him to start doing his own booking when he lost his booker and to do his own publicity with the connections he already has (he knows a ton of music people). And he did. And he did it remarkably well. He drove himself (and me) crazy with the emailing and phone calls over the past few months, but he’s really doing well for himself. Doing radio, playing shows, and getting 2 page articles in L.A.-area weeklies is no small feat.

The fact is, he’s 32 and not getting any younger, so I told him he might as well try for a career in music now. If he fails, oh well, at least he tried. And he won’t look back on his life as an old man with regrets. Also, the man is ridiculously talented. I know I’m biased, but he’s really good. And with absolutely zero pretension. So, he must do this. But it’s still hard when it’s a reality. And the fact is, the more successful he is, the more he’ll be gone. Man. Talk about a double-edged sword.

I’ve been having bizarre dreams since he’s been gone. Weird ones about him being in Portland for his tour (I lived there when we got together) and not talking to me and walking away (he never does that!) and then me getting carjacked with an old Portland buddy of mine. I also had a dream about the crazy hot film director who tried hitting on me at a film workshop I attended 2 summers ago (right after C and I got engaged). I found out I’m even faithful to C in my dreams! It was just more of what happened in real life, i.e., Crazy Hot dancing with me in an overly sexual manner and trying to cuddle with me at parties and film screenings and me being all, hello, I’m engaged!

Anyway, one of C’s very sweet and cool and mentor-worthy bosses wants to hang out with me on Wednesday! Yay! Maybe we’ll be all grown-up and cool and sit at a wine bar and discuss our ambitions OR maybe I’ll get her to go to a bar that screens Project Runway and be totally shameless!

Last night, C and I were trying to get back to Haight-Ashbury from Fisherman’s Wharf. We didn’t want to do a repeat of our Friday night marathon four mile trek, so we finally gave in and hailed a cab. The driver pulled over and he asked if we minded if he ran inside the convenience store real quick. After we had a chance to crack several jokes about stealing his cab, he finally came back out, coffee in hand.
And boy, did he want to talk. He asked us if we’d seen the Blue Angels (we had, but only incidentally). We started talking about how crazy it is that people do stunts on planes and how dangerous. He told us about incidents he knew of stunt planes crashing into their own audience and commercial planes crashing into neighborhoods. C told him about friends of his who had crashed a car going 80 miles an hour in a 20 mile an hour zone. They crashed into a house right as the owner was showing it to sell! The cab driver said that people are more likely to die between the ages of 16-20 because that’s when you do the craziest shit. Then he and C started trading stories of crazy stuff they’d done.

He told us one time he pushed his good friend into some green, froggy water and then ran away. “He could have DIED!” he exclaimed. Then he told us about rolling a huge tractor tire down a hill and into the path of cars on a busy street in Paris. It hit a bus which rolled sideways and bounced 3 times before narrowly missing a motocyclist. “We ran away LAUGHING!” he shouted. Then he told us about being in a train station with some friends. They wanted to climb up and get the eggs out of a dove’s nest. One of his friends dared to climb up. “You should have seen the minute he touched that cable. He was like charcoal!” The kid got electrocuted and died. There was some awkward silence after that story.

The driver said women don’t do that kind of dangerous stuff, just guys. C said probably because we’re smarter. The driver said maybe not smarter, just more scared. He said the worst thing women do is get pregnant. He said that women fall in love, they want to give their man everything they need. If they’re unlucky, they get pregnant. Then, he started talking about how love makes you blind. Like, a mother’s love for her kids. He said, “We have a saying, ‘Every mother thinks her child is a gazelle’. Even though it might look like a monkey!” He said every person in love thinks their husband or wife or girlfriend or boyfriend is the most handsome or prettiest on the planet.

By this time, we had arrived. He stopped the car and I got out. C was paying and the cab driver asked if I was his girlfriend. C said that I was actually his wife and that we had just gotten married. The driver said, “Can I give you some advice? As a brother?” And then he told us to take two years and do whatever we wanted, travel, fight, make up, whatever. But to give ourselves that time and then start thinking about kids.

OK, Parisian Cab Driver Man. We will.

I traveled to Marfa, TX last weekend with my husband, C. We were going to help out with the opening of El Cosmico, the new Liz Lambert venture in Marfa, along with some co-workers and friends.

Liz has a interesting story. She was an attorney working for the attorney general’s office who tired of the business and decided to take a seedy, trashy old motel and turn it into the Hotel San Jose, which is now one of the hippest and most relaxing places to stay in Austin while still having excellent access and proximity to great music, food, and entertainment. She even made a documentary about it called The Last Days of the San Jose. She’s also the force behind the cool coffee stop Jo’s Hot Coffee.

El Cosmico is (and I quote the website), “… the latest lodging concept from Liz Lambert and her management company, Bunkhouse… Lambert’s new project, El Cosmico, is currently under construction on 15 acres of land in Marfa, Texas. El Cosmico will be part yurt and hammock hotel, part residential living, part art-house, greenhouse and amphitheatre – a community space that fosters and agitates artistic and intellectual exchange…”

All of that translates in to a super cool opening party that was laid-back and fun in a truly Marfa way. C and I camped. Here’s our spot…

…there was a yurt…

…and a lonesome train…

…gorgeous dogs (in fact, I think the dogs thought the whole thing was about them)…

…transcendent music, courtesy of one Miss Barbara Lynn…

…amazingly delish Corn Raspberry muffins from the The Brown Recluse…

…and, of course, contemplative cowgirls.

Sure do miss you, City of Marfa…

…you took my breath away.

Austin City Limits festival this year was fun. I can truly say that after it’s all over. Some bands I was looking forward to dropped out , but I got a VIP pass so !

Friday and Sunday were the best lineups by far, but Friday and Saturday I was afflicted by the worst allergies ever. Most people who live in Austin experience horrible allergies at some point, and I thought I had ‘em licked. I felt like a frickin’ allergy meds commercial with the constantly runny nose and sneezing. I normally don’t take pills (even for headaches) but I tried antihistamines and when those didn’t work, I finally gave in and got the big guns. Decongestants. I’m normally fairly high strung and any kind of speed makes me nuts. However, the payoff was worth it and I felt WAY better on Sunday. Saturday I mostly spent sitting around the VIP area, relaxin’ and drankin’. I didn’t see one band. Not one.

My pictorial of the highlights and lowlights (click to see larger photos):

Best- Bjork

Worst- The fire(s)

Most hilarious- M.I.A. inviting the crowd on stage

And possibly regretting it:

That guy with the white headband is awesome! He’s so happy to just touch M.I.A.! He has a total “Hi, Mom! Hi, Dad!” expression on his face.

Overall, it was a lot of fun and I am a new fan of Bjork’s live show. The Christian protesters awaiting the festival revelers on the street after the show were a little creepy (and straight out of a movie), but, hey, it’s a free country.

Ahhh, Austin, you gotta love it!

The title is the most pretentious thing I’ve ever heard and so, appropriate for today’s theme: douchebaggery. Austin City Limits festival is upon us, and along with it a lot of silliness. This is one of the times of the year when everyone in Austin instantly transforms into a jackass. Suddenly, there’s an obsession with getting on lists and going to afterparties and what level of pass you have. I remember when this event was very small and I worked for my friend in the VIP area and had a great time. Over the years, it’s gotten better known and more crowded and had to deal with all the problems that come with huge crowds, big acts, and unpredicable weather.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not pining for the “good old days” because that’s just a waste of time. But my best friend and I have agreed that during festival times, Austin suddenly becomes a mini-L.A. or New York. It’s funny because most people live here to avoid that sort of thing. I was going to sit out the whole ACL madness this year (there aren’t really any bands that I was dying to see in the lineup) but my friend got me a VIP pass which is the only way to do this particular festival. It was an offer I couldn’t refuse.

I hope I don’t regret it.

Lately, I’ve been asking all my friends if they believe that there are people who can communicate with the dead. Kind of a weird and heavy icebreaker, but people usually have fairly strong opinions about it. I went to dinner with some friends the other night and in the middle of the conversation posed that question. My girlfriend hemmed and hawed a little, but her fiancee was surprisingly vehement. His eyes got all squinty and he maintained that nothing happens when you die. I was surprised because I expected HER to be the vehement defender of logic (she’s a scientist).

Even though I’m not particularly religious (raised Catholic) and I don’t necessarily believe there are mediums who can contact your dead relatives, I do wonder about the spark of life. Call it spirit, call it energy or whatever you call it, there’s undeniably SOMETHING that sets apart what’s alive from what’s not. You can look at a fallen bird and tell if it’s dead. It’s lost its spark.

When we are feeling peppy and particularly energetic, we say we feel ALIVE. When we have expended a lot of energy and work to achieve something (climbing a mountain, say), we feel alive. To paraphrase the first law of energy, energy is neither created nor destroyed. So what happens to the spark? Does it just dissipate and fade into the ether? Does it remain whole and journey somewhere else? Is it different for everyone?

No wonder religion is so full of reincarnation beliefs. Personally, I don’t know what happens but I think there is potential for just about anything. I can respect any religion’s views because I think, hey, it’s POSSIBLE. I brought this up with my husband last night. He, like me, isn’t sure about anything but is a very spiritual person. He’s always talking about how things affect his soul. So I know he knows what I mean. I speculated that maybe it’s when you experience the loss of someone important, knowing what happens next becomes more consuming.

My father passed away in 2000. When I think about where he is now, I can only think of a coffin full of bones. Morbid, I know, but I can’t get the image out of my head. I want to think that his spark, at least, has transformed into something good.

Also, when you find happiness with someone, the next stage seems to be fear of losing them. I can’t imagine what it was like for my mom to lose my dad, her partner of 28 years. He was much older than she, so he practically helped her to grow up. He was a friend, a mentor, a father to her children, a husband, everything.

I can’t imagine losing C , nor would I want to contemplate a life without him. It’s scary to feel so grown up, yet so vulnerable.

The Mohawk, Red River

“Hipsterish girl: (sneezes)

Other hipsterish girl: Bless you!

Hipsterish girl: When you die, nothing happens.”

WTF?

New Bohemia, South Congress

“Crazy girl: Should I get this? (holds up a pin that says, “IKE”)

Reasonable girl: No!

Crazy girl: He beat his wife. That’s cool, right?”

Hmmm…